RESISTANCE TO CHANGE

Covid-19 has put each of us and the entire world in a check position. Just like in the game of chess, we must do something to save the king, ourselves. Many families, businesses, and people have been put in a very precarious situation where they are experiencing hunger, bankruptcy and threat to their wellbeing. Even anxiety, depression, other mental health problems and substance abuse (alcohol, drugs, etc.) are rising at an alarming rate because people are not accustomed to being locked down for long periods of time, are not being able to work for their survival, are not able to provide for their families, are losing what they have built or accumulated during their lives, and are not knowing with certainty what the future holds for them, for all of us. It is in periods like this where we MUST be able to adapt and change as required, where we need to see not a problem but an opportunity, and where keeping a positive attitude is essential to their physical, mental and emotional health. Following is a story that may put things in perspective for you so you can be more open and less resistant to change.

Disciple: Master, why are we so afraid of change? Why is change so difficult for us?

Master: Because of comfort and security.

Disciple: I do not understand, Master. What do comfort and security have to do with change?

Master: Everything! Let me explain. When you were young, you did not worry about neither comfort nor security. In fact, you did not worry about almost anything. You were full of life, fearless and worry free. Your only concern was to experience life to the fullest, to have fun. To be precise, you did not look for comfort or security, you looked for life. You wanted to go places, meet people, try foods, and so much more. For a lot of people, life was amazing and full of endless opportunities and dreams.

Disciple: Yes, that’s true! I did not have many responsibilities, but I had many dreams and felt so free. So, what happened?

Master: As people grow up, they start accumulating more knowledge, education, material things, responsibilities (family, job, relationships, etc.), identities, etc., all of which are only going to make them more and more anchored, attached… entangled in life. The more they possess, the more they increase their fear of loss, their insecurities. They start being practical and start defining what they like and feel more comfortable with, who and what they think they are, what they think is important for them, and so on. Basically, they start building a cocoon where they are comfortable and secure.

Disciple: I can see the difference.

Master: Nature is wise and is giving us lessons all the time. They are everywhere for us to take and learn. People just live unconsciously most of the time and cannot see them. For instance, life, existence, is like bamboo, which takes up to 7 years to grow its roots before the tree starts growing above the ground. At that point, it grows fast, strong, straight and flexible allowing it to withstand winds and storms. The leaves never change color and the tree never loses all of them regardless of the season, weather, or terrain where it grows. A bamboo tree symbolizes patience, resistance, flexibility, perseverance, resilience, unity and service, values which we must always have in our lives.

When people are young, they are like bamboos. The sky is the limit! They grow fast. If their roots are well cemented, their growth will be fast and straight. They are flexible and immutable to what the circumstances are. They can change and adapt easily because they are not anchored to anything and are ready to conquer the world, to reach out and fulfill their dreams. Life is a mystery, an opportunity, a frontier to conquer that can be either scary or wonderful for them.

But as people age, they become the opposite, like a tree, strong and rigid. By creating comfort around them, by protecting themselves and what is theirs, or think it is theirs, and by increasingly becoming more insecure and fuller of fears, they become like a tree, rigid, easily breakable, which cannot withstand the changes of weather, seasons, terrain, etc. So now they are afraid of changing because it goes against what they have been building all their lives. Insecure people perceive changes negatively, as a way to lose what they already have. Secure people perceive changes positively, as an opportunity to gain or increase what they have. When you are resisting change, you are resisting the natural process of life, of existence.

Disciple: In essence, we need to adapt to the circumstances and be more flexible and dynamic.

Master: Correct! Existence is always changing. Everything is always changing. Even what we think is static is changing. In other words, everything is dynamic, forever changing. Whatever does not change will eventually die or disappear. So, when you were young, you were like the bamboo. You were able to change and mold to the changes without worrying about them. You were part of the changes.

If people were to understand that everything that they are experiencing is happening inside of them and not outside, then they would realize that all they need to do is to manage what is happening inside of them. Anger, fear, and frustration are not the ways to cope with changes. They are just the way people are experiencing the changes. If they were able to own without possessing, attachments, and entanglements, they would be able to change dynamically and would avoid a lot of suffering. Resistance to change can only bring suffering! As an integral part of this existence, we must all embrace change. Change is inevitable. Embrace it. Everything else is optional!

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Author: Maurice Correa
Website: pathtoone.com
Blog: p2oblog.blogspot.com